Pink Rhododendron Flower

Rhododendron Flower Bud



Full Bloomed Pink Rhododendron Flower


Thanks for stopping by today. Post linked to: Today's Flowers, Macro Monday

Neighbors

Guest post of the week by Deangelo Spencer

My neighbors just got Dish Network and the kids are over there all the time now! There is some new show they are hooked on, and just as soon as they get their chores and homework done, it’s out the door to the neighbor’s they go. I’d like for them and their friends to want to spend time at our house, so that I can be involved and know what is going on in their lives. I try to always have good snacks on hand, and be friendly to their friends. I’m going to look into getting Dish Network as well. From what it sounds like, I think the whole family will like it. It’s not really a matter of “keeping up with the Joneses” as my husband would say, it more just wanting the kids to play with their friends at our house. If it is a certain TV show that they want to share with their friends, I am happy to provide that if it means they will be around more.

Thursday Two Questions #71 Search Function Gadget

Gadgets galore. I like gadgets, don't you? I like them when they work well for me and for my readers, like the search function gadget. What is the point of having a gadget if it isn't being used? I am one neat freak when it comes to my blogs. I like clean, organized, areas. Even if it means I have 20 menus on the navigation tabs. At least I am organize, ok? Sometimes less is more and I keep trying to learn this habit, but of course some of the things I do on this blog that I think might benefit the readers, I am doing for myself too.


The gadgets I posted on Self Sagacity or Blogger Broadcast that I use a lot:

• I use the links to the Social Media channels for my blog a lot, when I am linking to parties.
• I use my search function gadget option a lot, when I am looking for a particular subject. Although the search funtion has not worked on Blogger Broadcast for a year+. It just recently came to life!
• I use my naviagtion bar to find posts in the categories so that I can find a certain recipe.
• My Popular Post list

The gadgets on other people's blog that I use  alot:

• Google GFC
• FB Like 
• Subscribe to email
• Popular Posts

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Here are Self Sagacity's Thursday Two Questions #71:
1) Which gadget or function on a blog do you use most?
2) In particular, do you like the search function gadget on a blog or use it at all?

By the way please remember to add me to your circles.Thanks!

Before you link-up, 1) make sure you read the Thursday Two Questions Details Page, 2) you have a link back to Thursday Two Questions, 3) and that you post your own Thursday Two Questions, 4) visit at least two participants and answer their questions - that is how you will create a bond and friendship. Links are monitored & spam will be removed. Thanks for joining us today.

Know the skills to manage your finance and avoid debts

It is often found that the U.S people are unaware of the value of dollars. They use their credit cards profusely but are least bothered to make payments on their cards. Hence, debt seems to spiral up and goes out of control. The credit collectors will call you continuously. If you ignore them, they can even sue you. Ultimately when you’ll find that paying off debt is impossible, you’ll file a bankruptcy. If you don’t want to face such situations, then you must start managing your finance from now.

3 Tips to live frugal
Read on to know how frugal living can help you manage your personal finance.

1. Eat out less:

Eating outside can be fun but on the other hand it is quite expensive. If both of you’re working, you must cook at home in the weekends. This will save your money as well as keep you health fit.

2. Collect coupons:

If you can use your computer, then you must search different sites to collect discount coupons. Use those coupons while you’ll go for your grocery shopping. This will help you save money on your groceries. If you want to save more, then you must choose a particular store in your area from where you must purchase every time. There you’ll be able to double your coupons and reduce your grocery expense. This way you’ll be able to save your dollars and use it to repay your obligations.

3. Take the membership of a library:

If you have the passion of reading, then you must be spending a huge amount of your money to buy books. You must stop doing such instead, search of a library of your locality and take a membership. This will help you get hold of your desired books and quench you thirst of reading.
Thus, try to follow the above mentioned tips to save maximum part of your hard earned dollars. This will help you stay current with your payments and avoid falling into debts.

About the Author: Jason Holmes is a regular writer with Debt Consolidation Care and is also a contributory writer with other financial sites. His expertise is woven around various aspects of the debt industry and with his e-books he tries to impart to people the different situations and simple solutions to get out of difficult situations. Some of his works include e-books like 'Credit Score The Quintessential Therapy for a Happy Pocket', Take Creditors and Collection Agencies to Small Claims Court' and, My Story- From Depression To a Smile'.

Iris Red and White Streaks

Thanks for stopping by today. Post linked to: Click on the following links to view the hosts and other participants: Wordless Wednesday, Rednesday, Outdoor Wednesday, 5Minutesformom

3 Phases of Sexless Relationship Slow Death

This post is dedicated to BG= best girlfriend. She is the closest friend I ever had. When I say close, I mean that we share many discreet thoughts and intimate events of our lives, yet we don’t see each other often like a hang-out-buddy. We have similar tastes, and often share the same convictions. To be very clear, BG has all the “Bs”, beauty, brain, boobs, butt, and bravery. So she is not lacking in anyway and the answer lies within her partner, yet, it might never be discovered.

There is always something that can bring a heroine to her knees.

Sexless Relationship is Abusive Relationship
BG’s relationship with her husband might seem perfect to other people, but I know her marriage is experiencing death at its finest. She asked me to write about the topic sexless relationship since it is a type of abusive relationship that is hard to recognize. Women feel alone, that they might be the only one on earth with so much libido, which isn't true. Most men are sexual, however some use it to their advantage, some are truly not interested in their long time mate, and few have low sexual desires. It can be more damaging mentally than a relationship with a sex maniac as you are not able to see the physical marks. A sexless relationship is mentally abusive. It is a parasitic emotional disaster that eats at the woman's self esteem. The abuser in this case is a husband, a provider, a friend, a kind person, a perfect citizen, and a great father. Yet, the man with this much perfection has to have some sort of error. You might as well imagine him grinding BG’s heart with a blade on the cutting board every night.

The last few weeks, I read some relationship articles. Of course, even when the articles claimed to not be advising typical modifications, they still did. Today, I am not giving advice, but just merely sharing. Advice is cheap, and it doesn’t work, if the relationship has already endured years of sexless living, it will eventually die. If your mate is fine with a sexless relationship and you’re not, he will be fine again after he pretended to try for you.

One article I found recently in a local magazine, called: “Stop Calling Him Honey…and Start Having Sex!” Started out sounding like BG’s situation, I was so excited in hopes of learning something from it to help her. The couple got along great. They are each other’s best friends. They did everything together, except having sex. Sex less than once a month, is what the author refers to as sexless. Although the situation was similar, the advice isn’t going to help BG. The author recommended treating each other with more dating etiquette, the nasty habits that you wouldn't dare share when you first date someone, you shouldn’t be sharing when you’re married.

It sounded like a plan, if you haven’t already committed the sins. Once you’ve crossed the line of dating etiquette into marriage etiquette, you could never go back. It will be very difficult to erase those visions of your other half sitting on the toilet, or his mouth dripping with toothpaste in the mornings.

What To Do in a Sexless Relationship?
My friends’ problem is more along the lines of “What is she going to do?” She loves her husband and she wants to be happy with him forever and after. But can she tolerate, live the next 40 years sexless with her mate? Or to have five-minute-sex with frustrations? When they do have sex, he ejaculates so fast that there is no point in having sex. She can’t sleep because of the frustration and huge disappointment while he snores and sleeps like a baby. She told me going to bed with tears is normal for her. She doesn’t know what to say to him as he laughs about their brief intimate encounters, apologizes, and shrugs it off. She on the other hand wished she could say: "Ok, that wasn’t good, but let’s do it again and this time stay a while. But that isn’t how it normally goes, it will be another month, or god knows when they will have sex again.

Some women would say: “What the “f”? You thought that was funny? If I were you, I would spend some time figuring out how to make the equipment work better!” Poor BG. She is so sweet, and doesn’t want to hurt her husband’s feelings. If you find yourself in this similar situation, you might as well put yourself in the category of abused! He is getting what he wants, when he wants, and she just there for his joy.

Recently, I ran across a question from one of the forums. I swear to goodness, just put this question in Google search and you will find it: “I Live In a Sexless Marriage | What Am I Supposed To Do??” This frustrated, sad woman was desperate for answers. Her husband told her he isn’t attracted to her anymore, and that he still thinks about sex, just not with her. He holds her at night and tells her he loves her. So what is the problem? She thought it could be her weight, while there were many responses from other commentators experiencing sexless marriages, they said it definitely wasn’t because of her weight.

Now friends, I don’t agree with those comments. I could see sexless if weight, or out of shape was in the picture. Even not getting along with your husband can also be a great sex killer. But what if you’ve got all the “Bs” = beauty, brain, butt, boobs, and your husband still have no desire to have sex with you? Is it because of ED? Some men suffer from the erectile dysfunction and they don’t want to feel like a failure in their performance. Well, BG even went as far as to get her husband some pills from their doctor, twice. And both times after he took them he said it nearly killed him, and dismissed the pills.

Dearest BG is in a slow dying relationship. What her husband doesn’t realize is the toll it took on her self-esteem. Yes, this is the results for most women who are not being wooed, caressed, and touched. They become resentful, bitter, and cold. Why? Because rather than being sweet and loving, which would normally yield in alike reaction from the mate, but in a sexless relationship, there can only be disappointment. She sweet and loving, he nonchalant and oblivious = he selfish, she resentful.

As I thought more about the question from the forum, and the details of the woman’s marriage – I thought perhaps her husband could be gay, and funny, no one in that forum has even mentioned the possibility. He wants to stay, doesn't find her sexually attractive anymore, holds her at night, and says he loves her like a family member, someone very dear. I would say, it has very similar tones of a gay man. I suspect he is currently exploring his sexuality, but not ready to let go. He needs her for the front, and for the comfort of being loved, as the homosexual relationships tend to be promiscuous and not reliable for most couples.

3 Phases of Sexless Relationship Slow Death
There are three things I wanted to point out in a sexless relationship. First phase, when one realizes that they are in a sexless relationship, they are worried. They want to fix it. They talk about it to their mate, and want to know why it happens. They both agree in getting help, finding ways to rekindle.

Second phase, nothing changes. There are many more years of sexless living, one mate is completely fine with it, while the other is torn to pieces. This phase lasts the longest. It goes and goes until the frustrated mate can no longer put-up for front, or realizes life is too short to be made miserable by someone.

Third phase, the frustrated mate decides to, 1) find a sex buddy, 2) starts building a wall to protect her vulnerability. She retaliates, and starts living as a roommate, brother and sister, family style, 3) the frustrated partner becomes weak, starts being anything and everything just to have some intimacy with her husband. She becomes a sex slave. Giving but not getting back.

Whichever outcome the sexless relationship falls into, the bottom line is the frustrated partner eventually wakes up, the same path applies to all the third phase choices, which is a decision to bury the relationship and move on.

To me a sexless relationship is abusive like slow deaths. It isn't obvious, yet a person is trapped in the marriage and children, and for many people sex is considered a want not need. A sexless relationship is demeaning to the woman, it makes her feel like she is begging for attention. It is belittling her self-esteem, and mentally depressing.

I am sorry BG, this is my final conclusion. There is no happy ending. As the relationship has slowly died. Even if you want to work it out, pretend nothing has happened. It will surface again and again. Even if things seemed normal for the most part, you will remember all the pain and frustrations you’ve been through to successfully bring his libido up to par, this alone will make you sick to your stomach. Unless you’re a saint, there is very little will power for you to pretend the last 15 years didn’t cut like a knife!

Thanks for stopping by today.
Just Write, Random Thoughts
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